Book Review of

Gay Children/Straight Parents: A Plan for Family Healing by Richard Cohen (2007), Downer’s Grove, InterVarsity Press, Illinois, pp. 223.

From the book:

For years, my own prayer was, “God, please take away these desires.” When he didn’t, I blamed him for my suffering. However, it was never my heavenly Father who gave me same-sex attractions. They were the result of a constellation of man-made factors: hypersensitive temperment, distant relationship with my father, sexual abuse from my uncle, antagonistic relationship with my older brother and over attachment to my mother. As each issue was revealed, God enabled me to heal them one by one. Today I am a much better man for it. So remember, I prayed the wrong prayer for over twenty-five years. I never received an answer because I was asking the wrong question. God could have removed my SSA in an instant, but that would not have healed my heart and soul (Pg. 59).

That was sexual reorientation coach educator Richard Cohen, the author of this amazing book. He was in the pit. He climbed out. He tells his story. He has become an expert in the treatment of same sex attraction disorder (SSA). He is Director of International Healing Foundation (check it out on the internet). Cohen explains “gay to straight” cogently and effectively in this book.

This book is essential for those with a loved one having gender identity problems, or confusion about homosexuality or who have come out as homosexual. The book is not a simplistic “how-to-do-it” by a so-called expert heavily endowed with certificates and degrees. No, this author has been there, did it, and is eager and enthusiastic, thankfully so, about telling the world. 

The book is not a fast track way, but it probably is the only way. I say that from my experience as a psychiatrist for children, adolescents, and adults for nearly 40 years. For those who struggle with same sex attraction disorder, efforts to change are sabotaged by a culture which has removed human sexual activity from the realm of the animal kingdom where it belongs. As usual with any book on any type of sexual problem, there is a universal failure to biologize sexuality which helps diffuse and neutralize the rampant, inappropriate, excitement associated with “sexuality” in our culture. It must not be forgotten that in the entire animal kingdom, sexual activity is related to offspring creation, and even in sexual activity, humans are out of synchrony with the animal kingdom and the planet and therefore are polluters again.

In contrast to the rest of the world, humans have turned sexual activity into nothing but obligatory entertainment which impairs human relationships by an unnatural focusing on the ejaculation reflex in males and orgasm (pseudo-ejaculation reflex) in females. Essentially, humans have become conditioned and brain washed to seek the squirt/moan-slime/squeal experience any way every way, rendering it totally irrelevant to human nature and all nature in the animal kingdom. What humans now do for sexual activity is non-sexual except in a secondary way. I have called this phenomenon “jaculasis” elsewhere and recommend http://www.catholicculture.org/library/view.cfm?recnum=721  – my article – “The Results Of And Psychological Causes of Contraception.” Thus, today, “human sexuality” is actually “genitality” and a form of “excretion (sexcretion),” serving the purpose of “relief” rather than offspring orientation as is the case for the rest of the animal kingdom. Enough of this digression, but it helps to know that in the sexual sphere, mankind is out of synchrony with the planet again, and that does include homosexuality.

This terrific book reminded me of a summary of homosexuality I have included in the Confirmation section of a re-draft of my book Happy Ending:

A homosexual fell into a pit and couldn't get himself out. A bigoted fundamentalist came along and said, "You deserve your pit." A psychologist came along and said, "Accept your pit, that way you'll be happy." A religious liberal came along and said, "Your pit is God's beautiful gift to you." A gay activist came along and said, "Fight for the right to stay in your pit." A gay researcher came along and said, "There is nothing wrong with you; you were born in that pit." An ACLU lawyer came along and said, "Discrimination against pits is illegal." A charismatic came along and said, "Just confess you're not in that pit." Respectful people came along and said, "We don't associate with pit dwellers." A New York Times editor came along and said, "All the news that fits is in that pit." An optimist came along and said, "That pit is half full!" A pessimist came along and said, "Stay there; there is nothing out of that pit anyway." A pit consultant came along and gave a 30-page strategic plan with 24 graphs and 10 pie charts. Plato said, "Get out of that pit for the greater good." Karl Marx said, "It is historically inevitable that you will get out of that pit." Tomas de Torquemada said, "I'll have you out of that pit in thirty minutes." Timothy Leary said, "What pit?" Nietzsche said, "If you stay too long in the pit, the pit will be in you." Oliver North said, "That pit is essential to national security." Carl Jung said, "The archetype for Original Sin is a pit." Ludwig Wittgenstein said, "The potential occurrence must be actualized by circumstances encoding ‘out’, ‘of’ and ‘pit’." Albert Einstein said, "Using timeless relativity, you could be out of that pit in no time." Aristotle said, "The potential ‘out of’ must be actualized." Buddha said, "To ask to get out is to deny the pit." Darwin said, "Stop digging and start climbing. Remember, your ancestors were in trees. Climb!" Hippocrates said, "You have too much phlegm." Machiavelli said, "The pit dominion viewed to administration misleads the adversary to change places boldly, but also with fear, for who among them has the strength to control with princely paragon's feigned virtue." Osama Bin Laden came along and handed him a book saying, “This book (a bomb disguised as a Koran) will get you out of the pit.” A communist came along and said, "Everyone should have as good a pit as that." A capitalist came along and said, "I will build you a condominium in that pit." A journalist came along and said, "At least you can get out; I'll never get out of this pit." FDR came along and said, "I promise you a chicken in every pit." Ron Reagan came along and said, "Mr. homosexual, fill up that pit!" "His mother came along and said, "It's your father's fault you're in this pit." His father came along and said, "It's your mother's fault you're in this pit." His wife came along, who was emotionally dependent, and said, "It is all my fault you're in this pit." But Jesus, seeing the man, loved him, and reached into the pit, put his arms around the man and pulled him out.

-- Anthony Falzaranno and Samuel A. Nigro

I strongly recommend this book. It belongs as such in every 7th and 8th grade as well as in every psychology class. Richard Cohen has not given us a religious book or a proselytizing one, but a history book of himself. The book is a story of Richard Cohen...and the world needs to know. He did it, and so can many because he shows the way.

None.

The authors declare that there is no conflict of interest.